The Quiet Art of Being Well Liked

 

The Quiet Art of Being Well Liked

If someone were granted a single wish, many would choose popularity. Being popular means being appreciated by many people, not just a small circle of friends. Yet true popularity is not something that happens by magic—it is built through awareness, balance, and character.

One of the greatest risks of popularity is inconsistency. You cannot be warm and respectful to some people while ignoring or dismissing others without revealing your true nature. How you treat elders—parents, teachers, neighbors, and relatives—speaks loudly about who you are. Courtesy toward them earns trust and shows maturity. At the same time, kindness toward younger children reflects patience and empathy. Both matter.

Popularity also depends on considering others’ feelings and opinions. In group decisions, you will not always get your way. Accepting this gracefully is a sign of good sportsmanship. Complaining or sulking only harms how others see you, while cooperation strengthens bonds.

However, being well liked does not mean surrendering your values. Standing up for what you believe is right, even when it is unpopular, requires courage. Such honesty is often respected more than silent agreement.

In the end, popularity is not about pleasing everyone. It is about respect, fairness, kindness, and integrity. Gained this way, it may be quieter—but it lasts far longer.

Borders of the Map, Freedom of the Mind

Borders, visas, and passports often feel restrictive, yet they exist for the same reason we lock our doors or hire security—to ensure safety. In a world marked by conflict, terrorism, and territorial ambition, nations draw lines not out of idealism but out of necessity. These boundaries are meant to protect a shared space, especially when neighboring powers may be hostile or oppressive.

It is tempting to argue that nature recognizes no borders. Birds migrate freely, animals roam without passports, and even viruses cross continents unchecked. But human societies are different. Human history is shaped by ambition, fear, competition, and the urge to possess more—land, power, resources. Contentment and harmony, sadly, are not universal human traits, regardless of race, culture, religion, or ideology.

Thinkers across time have urged humanity to transcend borders, and that aspiration remains noble—so long as it does not compromise collective security. Nationalism, territorial obsession, and rigid fundamentalism have repeatedly fueled violence and division. While symbols like flags, anthems, and patriotic rituals can unite people, when taken to extremes they risk turning into tools of exclusion rather than connection.

As Arundhati Roy sharply observed, flags can be used by governments to narrow thinking and later to sanctify the consequences of conflict. Similarly, when John Lennon imagined a world without borders, religions, or possessions in *Imagine*, he voiced a deeply human longing. That song resonated globally because it spoke to hope—but it also revealed how distant that vision remains. Such ideals assume a level of human perfection that the real world has yet to achieve.

**Rabindranath Tagore** was deeply critical of aggressive nationalism, seeing it as exclusionary and driven by false pride. Yet even he acknowledged that nationalism could have value if it served the dignity and welfare of the marginalized rather than the vanity of the powerful.

In this light, borders can be understood as practical arrangements—administrative and security tools—rather than ultimate truths. They organize the physical world, while the deeper challenge lies elsewhere: freeing the human mind. **J Krishnamurti** emphasized that true freedom is psychological, not geographical. It is the freedom to question, to doubt, and to reject blind conformity—an inner state that dissolves dependency and fear.

Krishnamurti warned that nationalism narrows thought and that selfish self-interest sits at the heart of destructive patriotism. Echoing this, the **Dalai Lama** has repeatedly pointed out that war and violence arise from anger, ego, and division. When humanity clings to “us versus them,” cruelty finds justification.

Lasting peace does not require erasing borders overnight. It requires cultivating a sense of shared humanity despite them. When people of different cultures, regions, and beliefs learn to see one another as members of a single human family, borders lose their power to divide—even if they remain on the map.

IF HE EXIST

I drive joy there was a doctor in Benaras who spent 7 minutes in the morning and evening for mediation on God. Knowing this, his colleagues and friends laughed at him. One day they argued that he was wasting 7 precious minutes on something, which he had been misled into believing. The doctor replied, “Well, if God does not exist, I agree that I am wasting 7 minutes a day. But, if He exists? I am afraid you are wasting your entire lifetime. I prefer to waste 7 minutes rather than a lifetime. Why should you grudge me the 7minutes joy that I derive 4m.-

ILLUSTRATED REVIEW : 7thheaven moment of the week India won second t 20 by 7 wk